July 2012

1^st July 2012 we are now 23 weeks and 4 days, little man has been quite active today, was sat watching a video of angel baby Liam and Angelo Jack started to move about and kick me. Been to Mum and Dad’s house for dinner tonight, was absolutely lush, came home took some pictures of my bump and had a shower. Put plenty of coco butter on my belly and then came and sat with Joel chilling out watching American pie again. Got 11 days until I see the midwife again and 27 days until our 4d scan, can’t wait to see our special little boy again. Let’s see if Angelo Jack goes mad when I go to bed again tonight and if he wakes me up again in the morning, he’s a little monkey but I treasure every movement and kick that he gives me, every day is special to us as is every week and month that passes. Each week is another week closer to meeting our special boy and holding him in our arms. Angelo Jack we love you millions.

6^th July 2012, I received a phone call from the hospital giving me a list of appointments to see the paediatric consultant. We are seeing the paediatric consultant of Friday 13^th July 2012 at 10am. I will go and see them armed with my list of questions and will fight to do anything for my son. He has been quite quiet today but has moved a bit, just to reassure myself I listened to his heartbeat when I went to bed, I had it very clear and loud, the clearest I have ever had it, heard it for about 10 minutes then he decided to move away from it and start kicking the monitor the little monkey.

7^th July 2012, I went to Kim and Paul wedding today, little man so active comparing to yesterday, he was kicking my bladder all the way through the service and then when it came to eating a meal he started to kick my ribs. Had lots of pictures taken and I took a few too. The weather wasn’t too bad; it was quite good to us. It makes me laugh because I got up at 8.30am had a shower, put my cream on, got dressed and did my make-up, all of that took me an hour so it was 9.30am before I had any breakfast, I washed up and then put my shoes on and went straight out the door for the bus in town. Had to go and get a pair of tights as the pair I  had were laddered, then walked down to a friend’s house, had a drink, got changed topped up my make-up and then left to go to the wedding. Went to the reception and then Joel came to pick me up at half 5 to go to his parents as we were having a takeaway curry with them. By the time we got home it was about 8.30 pm I was absolutely shattered so went to bed and put the television on in bed and fell asleep with it on.

8^th July 2012, spoke to Nan and Granddad this morning as when I was in town the other day I got some fresh carrots, broccoli and peas. Started preparing dinner and couldn’t remember what to do with the peas so rang Granddad to ask him, he found it hilarious and couldn’t help but laugh, I think it’s a bit of a baby brain moment.

10 July 2012, we went to bed at about 11pm, we lay in bed and cuddled up together. Joel put his hand on my belly and could feel Angelo Jack moving about; he fell asleep with his hand on my belly giving his son a cuddle. Angelo Jack was sticking his foot out last night too.

11^th July 2012, have midwife tomorrow, went to dentist today, survived it even though I could feel my heart rate going up, Angelo Jack certainly sensed it as he was kicking away the whole time as if to say mum it’s ok calm down please. We walked to the bakery afterwards to get some lunch and we defiantly enjoyed it. I set up a page on facebook for Angelo Jack, the link is https://www.facebook.com/groups/262631393838701/. My blog has gone mad as we have had  2134 views, it has been viewed in the UK, US, Russia, Canada, Australia, Denmark, Singapore, Germany, Ireland, Israel, France, Argentina, South Africa, New Zealand, Gibraltar, Switzerland, Hungary and Chilli.

12^th July 2012, I have seen the midwife today, she measured my bump and its measuring bang on dates, measuring 25 centimetres and I am 25 weeks and 1 day today. Heard little mans heartbeat again today too, it was 145 beats per minute; he was a little monkey to let us listen to it. He was sleeping until my midwife Jacqui started prodding and poking him so he started to move around and play football with the Doppler, he kicked it off of my belly but it was so funny. I recorded his heartbeat on my phone so that I have got a recording of him. I have to have a glucose tolerance test on the 27^th July, oh the joys of being starved from 10pm the night before. I see the midwife the following week. We see the paediatric consultant tomorrow. I had a phone call from great Ormond Street telling me to get a referral done to University College London Hospital and then they will refer me to great Ormond Street to tell me if they will operate on him when Angelo is born, providing all is ok and he is alive. I’m not getting my hopes up as I don’t know what the outcome will be but I am trying my hardest to do everything that I can possibly do for my son. Angelo Jack is so active tonight, I have had a bath which has calmed him down a bit but I don’t know how long for. Only 17 days left until we have our 4d scan and see our son again, I can’t wait, I’m so excited, and I feel like a kid with a new toy.

13^th July 2012, I have seen the paediatric consultant today, I think they are useless. They have told us that they won’t ventilate or operate on our son, he can have oxygen. They think that he will probably be born sleeping but if he’s not then they think he will only live for minutes. They think that he will be born looking very blue and he will struggle to breathe due to his diaphragmatic hernia and his lungs not being developed properly. I wish that I could take it all away from my son and that it was me who had it. They have said that if he proves them wrong and lives for hours and is making an effort to breathe then they will put a feeding tube in place, will give him oxygen and pain relief. They won’t take him away from us and put him on his own. We will have a private room at the back of the labour ward away from everyone else. I know whatever happens nobody can take away the fact that me and Joel will still and always will be his mum and dad. I have got some more reading and research today but I know with his problems his chances are slim but I just have to hang on to hope and faith. I know deep down that we will probably lose our son but he will always remain in our hearts. Went out with Mum, Laurissa, Peter, Mums friend and her daughter to berserk to distract my mind while Joel was at work, as I was driving myself mad sitting at home on my own. I am laid in bed with my laptop on my belly watching tele and Angelo Jack is going mad kicking away and sticking his bum out, I think it’s his way of saying mum move the laptop it’s not comfy. Angelo means messenger and angel and Jack is after my granddad. Angelo Jack is out little miracle, I just hope he has the strength to carry on fighting and prove everyone wrong. Angelo Jack mummy and daddy love you so much, you are our world and you mean everything to us. You will and are making mummy and daddy so much stronger even though it doesn’t feel like it at times.

14^th July 2012 we went to Nottingham today, we went to see some friends and go to Natalie’s baby shower, we had a right laugh, it was a good night. Joel stayed at Natalie’s house with the men they had takeaway while we had picky bits, drinks and games. I kept moaning at Joel on the drive over to Nottingham because Joel put some music on and Angelo Jack decided to start wiggling about and kicking my bladder, not a very good move with a full bladder. It was late before we got home so when we got home we went to bed and put the tele on, we laid in bed watching tele and had a drink before going to sleep. Angelo Jack was a wiggler most of the night, it was nice to feel him so much in one night, although he did keep waking me up so I had to keep getting up to have a wee all night long.

15^th July 2012 we didn’t wake up until 11.30 this morning, couldn’t believe it as we never sleep in until that time. Got up at 12.30 and made Joel a bacon sandwich and I had an egg sandwich, we went out at 13.30 and had a cavery lunch with Joel’s parents, brother, his brothers girlfriend, nieces and nephew. After lunch we went back to Joel’s parent’s house had a chat and a drink before falling asleep in the conservatory, we then came home; I did some of the housework while Joel cut the grass. Angelo Jack has been very quiet today, probably because we have had late nights all weekend and he has been quite active all weekend so he’s having a lazy day. We will listen to his heartbeat later on tonight when we go to bed just to make sure he’s ok and put our minds at rest, we will listen if he’s playing ball and doesn’t do his usual trick of moving and kicking the monitor as soon as I put it on, he’s such a little monkey but we wouldn’t change him for anyone or anything. Mummy and Daddy love you so much Angelo Jack.

16^th July 2012, Angelo Jack gave us a heart attack today, I hadn’t felt him move since 11 pm last night, and I started to panic so I rang my midwife. She sent me down the hospital to be seen and checked over, had a scan to check and all is ok. Angelo Jack Smith you are a little sod for scaring mummy and daddy today by not moving, went to the hospital and got checked out, the little sod is fine; he soon started wiggling when they scanned him just to check he was ok. All the water levels are fine and we got told that his growth is not bad considering his condition, he on the lower end of average, let’s hope he stays that way. We love you Angelo Jack but we don’t appreciate you giving us a heart attack, carry on growing, fighting and proving the doctors wrong but at least we got a sneaky look at you again today, you little monkey.

19^th July 2012, Angelo Jack has been quiet today but he was having a big party yesterday. I have been out catching up with friends today so haven’t been at home much. Had a nice bath tonight too as have got a lovely clean bed to get in to tonight, can’t wait but I officially know I’m pregnant when I can’t get out of the bath, had to shout Joel to come and help me and he found it hilarious, he said ok see you in an hour I’m just going to the pub, cheeky sod. Only 9 days until we see our son again but this time on a 4d scan, really can’t wait for it, I really want to see what he looks like. 

25^th July 2012, today we are now 27 weeks, another week has gone by and he’s still fighting and proving everyone wrong. He is our little fighter, a special miracle. Had a bbq at mum and dad’s house today, then went on to have a massive water fight, we soaked dad through but it was such a laugh, Mum and dad we laughing, the kids were laughing and Joel was laughing too, we were all in hysterics. You would think by now that dad would know me and my little tricks but obviously not, I say to dad let me have the hose I want to play with the kids and then turn it on him, oh my god it was such a laugh, can’t believe how much we were laughing tonight. When we were laid in bed tonight Angelo Jack was going mad, he was off on one, Joel felt him kick nice and strong for the first time as he went to sleep with his hand on my belly, he kicked Joel’s hand about 10 times, it was so nice. I can only picture the look on Joel’s face in my mind as we were laid in a dark room but I can imagine that it would have been a picture. I love my two boys so much, Angelo Jack is our little fighter and Joel is my hero.

26^th July 2012, only 2 more days to go until we see our son on 4d scan, we are so excited for it, it will be amazing. We have now got 100 members on Angelo Jacks page on facebook. We have had 2696 views of my blog to date, it’s been viewed in the UK, US, Australia, Canada, Russia, Singapore, Gibulatar, Ireland, Germany, France, South Africa, United Arab Emirates, Denmark, Israel, Argentina, New Zealand, Australia, Switzerland  Hungary and Chilli. It seems like it’s getting further and further around the world, it’s amazing to know how many people have looked at my blog and have read it. I know I am doing my part to get awareness out on to the world on Edwards’s syndrome.

28^th July 2012, well today is finally the day for our 4d scan, can’t wait to see our son again, we are so excited. Joel’s parents came with us for our 4d scan, they came and picked us up at 1pm, we got over to baby bond at about 1.40; we went for a walk and then back to baby bond for our scan. We had a small problem which was that the charity forgot to make payment for our scan; we couldn’t get hold of anyone as the charity is based in America. We resolved the problem by Joel’s parents finishing paying off the balance for us so that we were able to have our scan done. When I got home I sent an email to America to try and sort out the problem and to try to get my Father in laws money back. It was amazing to see our son in 4d, he looks like his daddy but my parents can see me in him too. Half way through the scan Angelo Jack had decided that he had had enough, he kept putting his hands up to his face to hide his face and then he turned his back to us, he’s so stubborn and cheeky. I went for another walk for about half hour and had a chocolate bar and bottle of fizzy cold lucozade. When we got back he had moved and decided to play ball again, he gave us some beautiful pictures. I will put some of them on here as there are 69 images in total, if you would like to see all of them then they can be viewed on facebook on Angelo Jacks page, the link is https://www.facebook.com/groups/262631393838701/ Please feel free to request to join and we will add you to the group so you can view and comment on his pictures. The lady that did our 4d scan was amazing, she was very patient and took her time, she couldn’t see an omphalecele like the doctors said he had got, she could however see a cyst in the cord close to the abdominal wall so hopefully she is right, when I see my consultant I will be challenging him. Angelo Jacks estimated weighted is 2lbs 2 ozs so he’s not as small as doctors have made out, hopefully he will be about 4 and a half lbs when he’s born.

29^th July 2012, yesterdays experience had made me think about helping others. It has inspired me to set up my own charity in order to help other mummy’s and daddy’s with trisomy babies. Without somebody telling me and putting me in contact about the charity that helped us then we wouldn’t have known about them and we wouldn’t have been able to have our 4d scan done. I have looked around in the UK and cannot see any charity that does the same thing or similar to what the charity in America does. This will be a long term goal that I set myself to do.